Buddy, can you spare a crime?

Somehow or other I've gotten onto a list of suckers people who donate to random charities. I have no idea how, since I haven't had a job since Perp was about 3 months old, and really, if I'm going to give money away, I'll choose the charity thankyouverymuchHeiferInternational*koff*.

The thing that outrages me is that they call and say, "This is Heywood Jablome from Random Widows and Orphans Charity That Sounds Official. I'd like to thank you for your generous support last year to RWOCTSO."

Um.
A) I have never heard of RWOCTSO.
B) I sure as hell didn't give you any money last year (sorry, orphans!)
C) If I HAD money, it would go to a reputable organization that, you know, I've heard of.
D) What the fuck?

I get the same call from the same guy for the firefighters retirement charity. WTF? Working for local government doesn't get you some kind of retirement benefits? Find another job, dude.

Am I a hardass here? I don't think so. I think calling up and conning people into donating based on a fictional previous donation is unethical if not illegal. Oh, fine, it's probably not illegal, but it should be. Lying to potential donators to either embarrass or cajole them into giving their money away to an organization that exists to fill a need that the supposed receipients' employer fills? There's a special place in the IRS's corner of hell for you guys.

Next time they call, and I know they will, I'm going spider monkey.